Why the mantra of "Being a human is hard"? from Brad:
Over the last few years, including the pandemic and post-pandemic, "Being a human is hard" has become my go-to phrase when talking with friends about their lives.
Relationship troubles? Yeah, Being a Human is Hard. Career uncertainty? Yup, Being a Human is Hard. Health and wellness, aging parents, raising children, understanding the financial implications of lifestyle choices? You betcha, Being a Human is HARD!
With these five words (I swear to you), what I'm actually saying is, "You are not alone," "I understand how difficult that must be," "Have you considered why they might have said/done that?" and so much more.
It sounds so simple, but its meaning alternates between a comforting balm and a challenging call for change in an often unsettling reality. It serves as a suggestion to allow myself grace in navigating life's challenges and a reminder to extend that grace to others because, well, being a human is hard for them, too!
While quick and simple solutions seldom last, embracing an overarching truth (platitude?) like "Being a human is hard" allows us at least a moment to offer ourselves and others grace in the absence of immediate or sufficient answers.
It offers perspective to see that one's struggles require acceptance and engagement.
When we accept a situation as it really is, in this moment, and not how we want it to be, we gain clarity and a realistic perspective.
This acknowledgment enables us to evaluate the factors contributing to our struggles objectively. It helps us identify areas where we have agency and influence, allowing us to make informed choices about addressing our challenges.
Accepting that life inherently presents difficulties, obstacles, and hardships involves embracing the reality that no individual is immune to adversity, setbacks, or emotional turmoil. This acceptance is crucial because it allows us to cultivate resilience and mental fortitude, enabling us to navigate the complexities of existence more effectively.
However, acknowledging the challenges does not imply passive resignation or complacency.
Engagement is equally vital to understand. Struggles should not merely be endured but also actively addressed. Recognizing our agency and responsibility empowers us to take proactive steps toward positive change and growth. This involves actively seeking solutions, making conscious decisions, and taking appropriate actions to improve our circumstances. It won't be easy, but that's okay; being a human is hard.
Taking action to address our struggles involves assuming responsibility for our lives and the choices that define them while also making a commitment to personal growth and development.
It may involve seeking support from others, acquiring new skills, adjusting our mindset, or changing our habits, environments, or relationships. By actively engaging with our difficulties, we open up the possibility of finding meaningful solutions and effecting positive change.
There are occasionally circumstances beyond our control that we must endure with patience and resilience, and that's part of the deal when you accept that being a human is hard. At the same time, it is about recognizing that it is hard for everyone and that we have some agency and responsibility. It calls for a proactive mindset, where we actively seek opportunities to improve our situation and make a positive impact on our lives and the lives of others.
This is the mission I have set for myself in creating this website, blog, and community forums. I know that I am not alone in the need for growth. I face my failings and recall with painful clarity the times when I have not been my best self. While this is a personal growth mission, I know I am not alone. I hope that in sharing this pursuit with others, I can find and share the strength and support I need with others who also need this.
As a poet, I'm most often associated with haiku, so let me share one that speaks directly to the mission of BAHIH.
The real question is,
what are we willing to change
to be who we want?